Detail It
Each of partners develops into yourself the internal estimated center. Value or meaning of everything, what you endure on experience, is defined not by what your partner speaks, not judgments of your parents, not the rules of your church, not imparted at school sights, but only by one sensation, arising at the deepest levels of yours being. For example, all these external influences, can drive to that available situation with your matrimonial sex is correct, lawful and natural and only proves love. You know everything of it. And nevertheless you can know, in the most secluded corners of yours being, also that actually this manipulation of one partner by another, that it is only pretence, the deceit, which does not have any relation to true love. So far as you have internal center of estimation, you rely on such judgments and they cause your further behavior. Thereby also it is supposed that you are not operated with those “it is necessary” and “it is impossible”, which our culture in all its aspects with such readiness substitutes instead of the values, which have been found out by you and for you.
When the person develops in all directions described by me, becoming independent and unique, then the person represents the worthy partner — not the slave and not the slaveholder, not shade and not echo, not always the chief and not always the subordinate, not self-confident person and indisputable not boring partner.
Development of both partners should be equal.
And at last, the efforts directed on awakening of original own “I”, so justify themselves that almost inevitably you will persuade and encourage the partner to follow to your example and to rejoice to each step made by him. So it is pleasant to develop together, to live with two unique and weaved lives!
I should add that in case, when this development of the independent person occurs only to one of partners, it is not encouraged and it is not cultivated in other partner, then the increasing distance between partners can become insuperable and the mutual relations sliding directly in precipice, can rescue only miracle. You should remember this and try to develop with your partner with the same speed.
Classes with young people, who are going to get married, in the conditions to have frank and sincere dialogue, is one of the important ways to help people to build stronger mutual relations.
The increasing popularity receives courses for married couples. These courses can bring considerable advantage to many spouses, but in case of deep dissonance and bad compatibility of spouses it can provoke their distance from each other or divorce. However, for the overwhelming majority it will promote only to interpersonal dialogue, to readiness to speak about difficulties openly and to solve them, to the best comprehension of weak and strong sides.
If you really want to have strong relations, you should always support and understand each other. Good luck!
It is almost impossible to avoid the cases when you have to face the how to get your ex back situation. The biggest problem here is that people think too seriously about how to get your ex back, instead of putting this whole situation in another way. It is not about how to get your ex back, really. This is about how to make it exciting again.
Tags: get ex back, how to get your ex back, relationship
Posted in Relationships · June 11th, 2010 · Comments (0)
The main error of girls – they wish to receive everything in one partner and as faster as it is possible!
The man has rather special point of view at relations with the woman: at first she should be good lover, then, probably, the friend. Then, when he will understand that she is good both as the lover, and as the friend – the wife, mother of children.
And the man enters relations to receive the lover, to take pleasure, and only pleasure. As soon as he begins to feel difficulties into relations, the man finds other love partner, and former relations he gradually brings to nothing.
And now let’s discuss the woman’s point of view at relations.
At once – the husband, the father of children! Simply she appoints him in husbands, without having looked into his eyes! Many girls appoint their partners in husbands on the first sight at them, without having heard even their voice.
And here infinite thoughts begin, analysis of each his sigh, demonstration of the better qualities, offer expectation – and as consequence, neurosis, pathological dependence, and dependence not from concrete partner, and from desire to get married and to give birth to the child.
Therefore it is necessary to change your mind, to insert other program. Instinct of continuation of the family is very strong, but we are not animals and we should control our instincts!
It is necessary to tell to yourself: three in one partner happens very seldom, you can meet such man in 50 years, and probably can not meet at all.
Therefore, to be happy, I will divide: the man, as the lover, the man as the friend, and the man, as the father of children.
Remember seven rules of happy family and try to follow them into your family relations:
- Your relations are the most important for you.
– Your relations are built on freedom; everyone does what he/she wants.
- You should try to be interesting to each other – you do not spoil mood to each other even in the trouble.
- You shouldn’t say lies to each other.
- You shouldn’t betray each other.
- You are always man and woman for each other; try to be always beautiful for each other.
These rules are voluntary for family; each of you should order them to himself (herself). After all you have the same situation in friendship: friends don’t swear, don’t agree, don’t sign the contract that their relations is friendship from tomorrow. Friends mean that there are certain rules of friendship. You will break them and friendship will also be broken.
You also should behave like this into your family relations – discuss your relations, argue, but everyone should order rules to himself (herself).
And at quarrels remind each other that your relations suffer from quarrel – and then reconcile quickly. After all, your relations are the most important for you!
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Tags: get ex back, how to get your ex back, relationship
Posted in Relationships · June 11th, 2010 · Comments (0)